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By cormander
So today I’m driving home from my daughter’s appointment at her pediatrician’s office. On the corner of a busy intersection is a guy in a Darth Vader suit holding a cardboard sign. It reads:
The Rebel Alliance has
destroyed the Death Star.
Please Help!
There are a lot of panhandlers around here. This one was, by far, the most creative. I really wish I had a camera to take his picture.
If I had any cash on me at the time I might have actually given him some just for the sheer comic relief.
By cormander
Last summer there were a LOT of Hummers on the road, it seemed like the dealerships were selling them off like hot cakes. Then winter hit, and there for a long time I didn’t see any at all.
Now that winter is coming to an end, I’ve started seeing them again. Today is a warm and sunny day, and today alone I spotted quite a few.
So I wonder, do Hummers hibernate for the winter? They sure are the size of a bear relative to other vehicles.
By cormander
So I try to use common sense:
$ perl -e 'use Common::Sense;'
Can't locate Common/Sense.pm; not available.
Okay, so I try to get it:
cpan> get Common::Sense
Warning: Cannot get Common::Sense, don't know what it is.
Opps!
By cormander
Run this on your shell:
perl -e 'print substr(lc join(",", map { $_ = "\"$_\"" } sort { $b cmp $a }
grep /^[a-z]/, split /\n/, qx(ls)), 0, 10+rand(100)*2), "\n"'
There are 13 operations here. The end result the output of the “ls” command (in your current working directory) being put on one line, only showing items starting with a lowercase alphabetical character, encased in quotes, comma separated, reverse sorted, lower-cased, and having it’s length cut randomly.
What’s the point? In this case, there isn’t one, but I love the fact that you can do stuff like this in perl.
UPDATE: Yes, there really are 13 perl operations here. If you counted and got to 11 or 12, you’re close, but no cigar.
By cormander
The majority of the people in my major in college are new to the IT world. It’s funny to see their reactions to the systems. Face it, the unix world is a little different from normal reality, and perhaps its a little more paranormal due to the actual terms used. There’s the standing association about IT guys loving dungeons and dragons, and it’s very much based in reality. Consider the following creative I put together for class:
You have to fork a processes, which is also referred to as spawning them, and sometimes they turn into zombies. You have daemons that run in the background, and you eventually need to kill them. You have the python language, the anaconda system installer, and you have to occasionally fsck the disks. Source code is usually inside tar, and you bash the system each time you login. Passwords are kept in the crypt, java is in the jar, and there is an echo with everything you type. Oh, and there is a lock on a lot of things.
This would totally sound like the 7th ring of hell to me if I wasn’t already so used to all of these terms.
By cormander
Ever noticed the permissions for /dev/null?
crw-rw-rw- 1 root root 1, 3 Apr 27 07:33 /dev/null
Well, since /dev/null is a black hole, it’s kind of ironic that its permissions are set to 666. Kind of like hell for bits.
“[...] no one could buy or sell unless he had the mark, which is the name of the beast or the number of his name [...] His number is 666″ (Rev. 13:16-18).
Since we all buy online now, we’ll all need a /dev/null before this revelation is fulfilled. Ergo, Jesus Christ will not come and save us all until every PC in the world is installed with Linux, BSD or Mac.
I guess that makes Windows good instead of evil? After all, Windows has services and icons, while Linux is full of daemons and zombies.
By cormander
A friend of mine sent me an image about creationism vs. evolution and it sparked a short discussion about it … here’s what he said in regards to how humans came to earth:
“I believe we populated venus and a planet that is now the asteroid belt. The rulers right hand man attempted a coup and venus was nuked and the planet where the asteroid belt was at was, well, yah. survivors, some came here, some went to mars. end of story.”
That would make a great movie.
By cormander
Some tell the time by the position of the sun in the sky. Others tell time by how hungry they are (or aren’t). Most of us just use a clock in one form or another.
Me, on the other hand, can tell time by looking at traffic:
* 6:00 AM
- No cars on the way to the freeway. Takes very little time to get there.
- Cars driving on the freeway are generally going the speed limit.
It’s early, no one is in a rush to get to work. Besides, it’s dark, why risk it?
* 6:45 AM
- Very few cars on the way to the freeway. Take very little time to get there.
- Cars driving on the freeway are going the speed limit, with a few going over.
It’s still early, still no rush to get to work. And it’s still a little on the dark side.
* 7:30 AM
- Lots of cars on the way to the freeway. Takes a good ten minutes to get there.
- About 1/3 of the cars on the freeway are speeding, some more ridiculously then others.
It’s getting a little later. Some of these people traded in a quick shower to sleeping more and are making up for it on the road. Since it’s not that dark anymore, why not go a little faster, right?
* 8:15 AM
- Might as well be considered a traffic jam. Takes between 10 and 25 minutes to get to the freeway.
- Freeway is overcrowded. About 2/3 of the cars are speeding, most of which are at least 10mph over the limit.
Something kept these people at home this morning. Their alarm clock didn’t go off, or they didn’t set it (which is just an excuse, they didn’t hear it or just flat out ignored it); their kids missed the bus to school and they had to take them there first; or they hate their job and subconsciously drag themselves in the morning to get themselves fired for always being in late.
And because of this, they’re really booking it to get to work. Also, since it’s bright as day by now, people think they can see everything.
* 9:00 AM
- Traffic jam. By this time, some idiot who doesn’t know how to drive causes an accident (whether or not they’re actually in it is another story). Be prepared for a wait of up to 45 minutes just to GET to the freeway. Might as well just wait until 10AM to leave.
- Not a whole lot of traffic on the freeway. Just about everyone is speeding. Beware of accidents by the idiots who actually made it to the freeway.
* 10 AM – Noon
- Very few cars on the way to the freeway. Take very little time to get there.
- Very few cars on the freeway. About 1/3 of the people are speeding. Things are slowing down b/c of all the cops on the side of the road who have pulled people over.
* Noon – 4 PM
- Lots of cars on the way to the freeway. People are taking their lunch breaks, others are shopping, and some just woke up and hopped into their car to go somewhere.
- Not a whole lot of cars on the freeway. Everyone is speeding because the cops got bored and aren’t around anymore.
* 4 PM – 5 PM
- Lots of cars on the way to the freeway, but not too bad yet. A good portion of people are getting off of work but most of them are still staring at the clock, just waiting for it to hit 5.
- Freeway is starting to get overcrowded, but that doesn’t mean that they’re slowing down either.
* 5 PM – 7 PM
- Traffic jam, and not because there was an accident this time (although it does occasionally happen). Everyone, EVERYONE is trying to get away from the grind. Businesses across the area suddenly become desolate.
- Traffic jam on the freeway. Cars are bumper to bumper for miles on end.
I hate rush hour traffic. I hate how they call it rush “hour”, it’s not accurate at all, rush hour is always at least two hours.
* 7 PM – 10 PM
- Very few cars on the way to the freeway. Takes very little time to get there.
- It’s getting dark, but that doesn’t seem to slow people down this time. It’s after rush hour, so people are enjoying the fact that the actually can speed now. Others speed because they have such a busy life and want to cram everything into the day … they have to shave time somewhere.
* 10 PM – Midnight
- No cars on the way to the freeway. Takes very little time to get there.
- Not a whole lot of cars on the freeway, but no one is going the speed limit (except me and really old people). Cops are everywhere.
* Midnight – 6 AM
- I don’t drive during this time. At least not more then a few times in the past 4 years.
Conclusion:
The later in the day it gets, the more likely it is for people to speed. I’d hate to find out how bad it really is between midnight and 6 AM.
By cormander
A few weeks ago I learned of the Linux Hater’s Blog, and I’ve got to say, the author makes a lot of very good points. Now for those of you who are unfamiliar with some of the terminology used there that I’m sighting here; “luser” is “Linux User” (L user), and “freetard” is, well, a “retarded user of free software”. I’m not fond of the choice of the word “retard”, but I do see the humour in it and have since gotten over it.
Linux is far from perfect, Open Source is not the saviour of the world, and as much of a “freetard” and “luser” that I am, I actually use Windows XP as my choice for desktop environments in most situations. Right now my laptop is running Fedora 9, but only because I have a very specific need for it, but all my other desktops I’ve ever had have had a windows OS on them 99.9% of the time.
Microsoft is a software giant for a reason- they aren’t all bad- and there is a lot of very innovative people who work there. One of my college professors (an avid luser) used to work at Microsoft, and I’ve never once heard him speak poorly of his experience there.
What sparked me to write this post is a Challenge a luser put up against Linux Haters. GOD! How stupid can you be? The person who writes these rants has _obviously_ kicked everyone’s ass in debate in high school, and unless you’ve done the same, be prepared to get ripped a new one. I mean, it’s like Godzilla on a rampage and you go and throw a rock at it. It’s going to stop, look you in the eye, and then squash you like a bug.
Linux Haters, whoever you are, keep it up. I enjoy reading the imperfections of Linux. After all, it’s the imperfections that I learn from. I’ve spent so much of my carrier fixing things in GNU/Linux and various software that runs on it that I have a very deep understanding on how operating systems work. Seven years of being a system administrator and programmer certainly has made me witness the good, the bad, and the ugly.
Oh, and If you’re reading this Linux Hater, this comic strip about Firefox reminded me of what you stand for. I mean, what IS the hell wrong with us freetards? Sometimes I have to wonder if the people at the heart of the Free Software Foundation are Socialists; but I don’t have the energy to write about that tonight. Maybe another day.
By cormander
One of my favorite TV shows of all time is Firefly. From that show, one of the best quotes is from the episode War Stories where Mal says:
“About fifty percent of the human race is middle men and they don’t take kindly to being eliminated”
This is SO TRUE especially when it comes to the hosting business. Consider the following situation where a guy puts up a website. He got the website domain and hosting from a friend (customer A) who has an account with a web design company (customer B). This design company buys hosting accounts from a shared hosting company (customer C) which basically sells accounts through cpanel or plesk. Their control panels are on VPS servers they get from a VPS server provider (customer D) who rents server space from an HSP (customer E) which actually turns out to be a company that co-locates at a datacenter (source provider).
Oh, and I forgot to mention that the company who owns the datacenter probably hasn’t paid off their mortgage yet so technically they’re customer F and the bank is the source provider. But you can take it even further where the bank is customer G and the source provider is the mega-corporation which owns the bank.
Sheesh.
